Two Steps Forward, One Step Back (Part 2)

I mentioned yesterday that last week we spent trying to make some forward progress on two fronts: getting Spike to stop dropping food/utensils/cups/plates/bowls from his high chair, and attempting the transition from crib to big boy bed.

Today's post is about the dropping.

This has been driving me crazy since Isaac began to sit in a high chair and my annoyance has greatly increased as Thor increasingly gets in my way of bending at the, ah-hem, "waist." At first I told myself it was not a battle worth fighting, but Izey's a big boy now and can be held to a simple standard: don't make an unnecessary mess for your incapacitated mother.

The rule has been communicated in every way, shape and form we could think of, and Izey knows he's not supposed to do it. We tried quickly taking everything away from him, but he didn't seem to mind. We tried consistent time-outs with every dropped item, but he would just say, "Time out!" as the food splattered on the kitchen floor. We've given him a positive alternative to dropping his stuff--put it on the counter or give it to Momma--which he sometimes did, and we were watchful to scoop things up when he was done and before he got bored...but nothing was working.

Then it dawned on me--reward good behavior instead of punishing bad! I knew from my teaching days that rewards work way better as a motivator than punishments do, so we began a new tactic: don't drop, earn a cookie.

Throughout each meal, Zach and I have turned into idiot cheerleaders: "You are doing so good, buddy! You're eating like a big boy! You're on the right track for a cookie! If you keep it up, you get a cookie when you're done!" Isaac usually responds by being "all done!" 5 or 6 times before he's really eaten his fill of the healthy food.

The pattern that has emerged for some reason has been that Isaac earns his cookie at every lunch and gets this close at dinner before dropping one thing on the floor at the very end.

The biggest change, though, is that using a reward (or bribe, whatever you wanna call it!) feels so much better than using a punishment. Every meal was ending with a time-out, which is a really yucky pattern to be in. Now we don't have to get upset, all we have to do is give or not give the cookie. Isaac gets a little bummed when he doesn't earn his cookie, but we can all move on much more easily.