Isaac's bedroom window is graced by a lovely curtain made by Grammy Pammy. I don't open the blinds behind the curtain much because my nursing chair is right next to the window and nobody wants to accidentally look in my window and see Isaac's milk source. Well, maybe some people do, but I certainly don't want them to.
Anyway, it's getting cooler out, so soon we've been abandoning the window air conditioners in favor of open windows. I would like to be able to open Spike's window, and so I decided to wage war on the spider who lived between the window and the screen. I wouldn't be so concerned if he lived outside the screen, or if he weren't so big and scary (about 1.5 inches, including legs!), but if I open the window, this guy's comin' in.
Resolving to be brave and take care of him myself, rather than ask the usual Spider Killer in our house, I asked Zach, "If I suck up a spider in the vacuum, will it live and crawl back out?" He assured me that our super powerful vacuum (thank you David and Karen!) would kill the spider and all its ickiness. I strapped Isaac in the Baby Bjorn (genius! use the baby as a shield!), gave myself a pep talk ("You're, like, 1200 times bigger than this bug!"), and armed myself with the vacuum hose. Alas, when I swallowed my fear and opened the window, the spider dashed for his secret hiding place before I could see where he went.
"Well," I told myself, "I can still destroy his home. he he he!" So I sucked up as much of the webs as I could. I thoroughly vacuumed all around the window, hoping I had unknowingly also sucked up the big, scary spider.
HOWEVER...
Outside the upper part of the window there was a whole huge city of webs, and I wasn't about open the window that far to let in whatever had constructed this nest of evil. Leaving Isaac inside with Daddy, I went around to the side of our building and pulled out the big guns: the jet stream setting on the hose. I attacked the spider city in full force and only halfway through did I see the Grand Daddy Master King of All Spiders struggling to cling to his now drowning web. I jumped back, even though I was already about 5 feet away, but continued spraying with all my might. This Grand Daddy spider had to be at least 3 inches long, including legs, and had a butt on him like a super ball. I still shudder just thinking about him. But he was no match for the jet stream hose. I prayed that I had drowned him.
Every time I've gone outside since then to survey the damage and prevent rebuilding, I have scanned the area from afar for any big, scary spider movement. I didn't see anything and started to relax when....
He came back. YUP, Grand Daddy spider lived through the attack. He hasn't started rebuilding yet, but as of my morning run today, he is crouched in a nook next to the window, just waiting for me to let my guard down. I was going to attack him with the hose again, but then realized I couldn't leave my baby sleeping in his stroller on the sidewalk while I got the hose from the back of the building.
You win this round, Grand Daddy.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Spider Wars
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You're hilarious . . . and oh so brave! I eagerly await the news of your final victory - death to all that slithers and crawls on more than four legs! (and some of the four-legged things too!)
ReplyDeleteKaren
Ugh!!! I'm shuddering just thinking about this huge spider you speak of!
ReplyDeleteI recommend Ortho Home Defense Max. We (Tom) spray it on the outside of our house all along the perimeter and around every window and door. Sometimes Tom doesn't even squish spiders that he sees - he just runs for the Home Defense and watches the spider slowly die.
A really good way to kill bugs (sanitary, too) is to get a spray bottle full of isopropyl alcohol (I prefer the 91% solution). Simply spray it on a bug and it dissolves their exoskeleton, while simultaneously sanitizing the area they're in. Even if you don't hit them exactly, it'll slow them down enough to get them again (especially important when trying to get rid of houseflies). Sometimes it'll take a while, but it works on everything (even roaches, I unfortunately know from experience), and it's kind of fun to watch the bug squirm in agony. If they're in a non-flammable area (sink, bathtub, something like that), you can even set them on fire. I wouldn't have the baby in the room while you're doing it, as it'll smell like alcohol for a few minutes, and that stingy smell will likely get the baby upset. Still, it's much more effective than a vaccum or spray hose.
ReplyDeleteKate - You should really put on your She-Ra super hero outfit when you do battle with these beasts.
ReplyDeleteDad.
I wish I had a superball butt.
ReplyDelete